


The Gift

by Confused_Ghost



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Bottom Zim (Invader Zim), Dib is Of Legal Age (Invader Zim), Feral pilot dib, M/M, The dibs be thirsty for Zim, This is the Dibvoid, Top Dib (Invader Zim), concept dib, irken dib, more dibs, poor Zim, there was an attempt, there will be more tags as this goes on, you guys know the Zimvoid?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-10
Updated: 2020-01-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 16:02:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22199803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Confused_Ghost/pseuds/Confused_Ghost
Summary: Every anniversary Zim feels horrible for not giving Dib the best gift ever, like he feels he deserves. This year he wasn't going to fail his mate again. But who can he converse with for creating the best anniversary present ever? Gaz refused to help him.... if only there were someone out there with a brilliant mind like his- wait! The Zimvoid! The trip will take fairly quickly if he does it right this time! But wait, are those the coordinates?
Relationships: Dib/Zim (Invader Zim)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 126





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! I just had to get this idea out of my chest!  
> The idea sounded fun so I wanted to share what I had so far!!  
> I haven't read the comics so fair warning- I hope it's still decent though TTvTT

Zim hummed as he browsed the grocery store, occasionally having to readjust his hold on Gir’s child leash as he inspected the products.

A purple cereal box caught his eye and he reached out for it, struggling just a bit as it was on a higher shelf. Once in his grasp he read the ingredients plastered on the side of the box, calculating the calories in his head. 

Dib had once said to get him healthier foods, that he couldn’t live off of just sugary meals alone; _which, by the way, is utterly preposterous._

The calories on this _bland_ cereal looked acceptable but… Zim pulled a face as he thought about the taste. How can anyone live without the sweet and satisfying high that only sugar could provide?

He threw the box into the cart with a wince and continued on his way. How humans could eat such unappetizing foods was beyond him. Where was the sugar? The fat? Where were the good parts? Those foods Dib deemed ‘unhealthy’ were the only human foods Zim could eat! And even _then_ it was pushing it. 

His antennae caught the sound of something heavy being thrown into the cart and he sighed. 

“Gir, put it back.”

“But! But I need it!” The fake dog whispered in a high pitched whine; at times like this Zim appreciated when Dib taught Gir to be less loud, it was something to do with being less suspicious? Apparently, Earth dogs shouldn’t talk, but whatever the excuse was- Zim was grateful for it.

“You do not need another inferior earth communicator…. thingy.” Zim trailed off, glaring at the infernal childish packaging of the… ‘walkie talkies’? What a _stupid_ name.

“Mary would let me get it!”

“No, no he wouldn’t Gir, now put it back!” 

Zim faltered when he started to hear the faint beginnings of a whine; the same sound Gir always emits just before he trails off into a tantrum.

It was so high pitched a normal human being would be unaware of it; he could not count the number of times Gir would catch Dib off guard while the human was helping in watching over him. While he remembered how funny it was, for Dib to panic over a wailing Gir, it gathered way too much-unwanted attention upon them and himself for it to be fun.

“Okay! _Okay!_ Fine Gir! _Keep it!_ But no more toys!” Zim caved, pinching the ridge between his eyes as the disguised unit cheered.

He might not be wanting to take over the Earth anymore, and he may not want to destroy the Earth anymore, but he still didn’t want to be exposed as an alien because of the attention he would get for Gir going bat shit crazy.

So far the human race did seem exceptionally ignorant in regards to his actual identity, so who’s to say, _really,_ if he would actually be outed. Though, Ultimately though the risk was still too high for him to take. Dib had told of him all the horrors that could befall on him if he were to be revealed as an alien. Just thinking about it sent a shiver down his spine. 

The only one he wanted to do an autopsy on him was, well, _no one_ . If he had to choose, however, then, of course, he would obviously choose Dib, but if that was his choice then he wouldn’t even be cut open. His boyfriend didn’t have that desire anymore after all, not when he had a _new_ and more _fun_ way to get inside of him-

A ring shocked him out of his heated thoughts, making him flush in embarrassment. He fumbled for the phone in the pocket of his oversized jacket while adjusting to hold of the leash in his other hand. He scowled as he Searched, regretting to have grabbed Dibs stupidly large jacket. Frustrated, he stopped pushing his cart in favor of shoving his hand in harshly, finally he grabbed the wretched menial technology.

He unconsciously yanked on the leash, stopping Gir from harassing another small pet, as he checked the caller ID name. The name ‘ **mate** ’ stared back at him and he grinned, immediately clicking the green button.

“Dib-mate! I am almost finished with the shopping of your weird human produce, I just need to fetch some more of the…..” Zim drawled on trying to remember the stupid plant’s name, “Patater- no Potato? Yes! Potatoes! Then I will come back hom-”

“ _Yeah, can it Zim, Dib left his phone at my house. I was hoping he was with you so I wouldn’t have to work hard to find him.”_ Gaz groaned into the phone, the audio slightly muffled; obviously not an issue Zim would have to experience if he had Irken tech. “ _Looks like that isn’t happening though.”_

“He’s probably doing his job right now but, Dib visited you? Why?” Zim responded, furrowing his brows in confusion. 

The alien flinched when a human passed by him aggressively with a scowl, making him notice that he was taking up the aisle. Gritting his teeth he begrudgingly moved 

“ _Yeah, well I promised not to tell you or I’ll ruin the surprise or whatever_.”

Zim grumbled, he knew what she wanted him to do, “I will buy you that new er, um, _game_ you’ve been rambling about for your,” Zim cursed as he probed his pak for the name of Gaz’s machine. “Erm- Game slave 5?”

He worried his lip at the female’s pregnant silence.

“ _He was planning something for your 4 something year anniversary. That’s all I’ll say and I expect the game tomorrow. Tell Dib to come pick up his phone when you see him.”_

Zim opened his mouth to say something else when the telltale tone of the call ending reached his antennae. His mouth stayed open as he processed what his mate’s sister just told him. 

Dib was already planning for their anniversary? No! That can’t be! It was still a few weeks away! Did humans normally plan that far away? He cant remember Dib planning this early before, ........ or had he? _In secret?_

“Gir! We’re leaving! Give that worm baby their stuffed mammal back!” Zim rushed, gripping the cart hard as he rushed down the aisle.

He hadnt waited for Gir’s response before rushing, though he did hear the unit swallowing- so it was to be assumed he ate the child’s toy.

Back at the issue at hand- this was _horrible!_ Zim couldn’t be more horrified! He couldn’t allow this to happen! It was a disgrace! It would be another hit to his pride! 

In all of their celebrations in commemoration of their time together, Dib always- infuriatingly- outshined him in terms of gifts.

In their one year anniversary, he was still getting used to anniversary gifts- they never bothered with monthly anniversaries so Zim never got the practice- and Dib had surprised him with a simulated planet invader game. A game he could play with the idea of conquering a planet, and although he knew it was fake, the modified headset (was it called a VR?) he wore made it seem so real. Of course, it paled in comparison to his hologram room- but he knew Dib had made the game especially for him, and it forced him to tears. He still plays it to this day, Gaz had obtained a new high score and he would be damned if he didn’t break it. It was _his_ game damnit!

The second anniversary Zim thought he finally had a hold on the weird human ritual, he had crafted Dib his own- faster- portable hologram computer for his paranormal pursuits. At least he believed he did, then Dib gave him his gift. He had made Zim a whole Irken feast, consisting of familiar side dishes and desserts. Of course, it was all junk food in the end- but, it was all food from space, food Earth couldn’t even compare to or replace. 

He hadn’t known how much he missed his old diet until it was right in front of him, and again he was forced into a pathetic pile of tears. He later learned that Dib had called Skoodge and had the other invader teleport him the ingredients.

The third anniversary Zim had done his absolute best to create the best gift! He had spent so much time and effort- using as much of the irken technology he had left to spare. He couldn’t let Dib outshine him every anniversary! He was the superior species in the relationship! He had more advanced technology! He shouldn’t be failing as he was! 

So, with those thoughts in mind, he improved Dib’s car. He replaced the generator with something more powerful, adjusted the tires for the new wings that would slide out for flight, added thrusters, improved the windshield to withstand more pressure, installed an oxygen tank for space travel, added a gravity controller, and added a wider radio range.

It was the best gift! Dib had been recently complaining about how uncomfortable Tak’s ship was becoming, most likely due to his rather extreme growth spurt; which made sense considering those cruisers were made for irkens who did not normally grow to be over 6 feet tall. 

Zim thought it was the best anniversary gift. Then Dib had revealed he got them tickets to a Shmoopsy themed amusement park, where- when fireworks cluttered the night sky- Dib had given him a promise ring. 

Although the human swore up and down Zim had given him the better presents- Zim knew in his heart he really didn’t. And that wasn't acceptable! That human shall properly feel the extremity of his love if its the last thing he does!

He puffed out his chest as he reached the cashier. Hastily throwing his goods onto the conveyor belt as he filtered through all of his potential ideas.

“That will be- Oh shit! Your dog is biting that baby!” The employee behind the counter gasped, pointing behind him where he assumed Gir was.

“Yes yes! Whatever! Give me your price! I have places to be you drone!” Zim stressed waving his pink wallet in the human’s face.

“But your dog-!”

“Give me your price!”

“I’m calling security-”

Zim rolled his fake violet eyes, he had no time to waste! His pak legs shot out, spearing the outdated phone the worker was reaching for and throwing a guesstimated amount of money onto the counter.

With that, he swiftly gathered his purchases, throwing some into his pak, and raced out of the store, Gir flailing in the air behind him as he was being dragged by the leash.

He must have the best present for Dib!

  
  


~

  
  


“How about you buy him a GIANT burrito! Then he could lay down in it and wrap himself up and become a big burrito!” 

Zim’s head dropped down onto the table as he felt hope slip away from his fingertips.

The moment he got home, after putting away the groceries he carried in all of his arms- metal and organic- he got to work on creating the greatest idea of a gift. 

He’s been at this for 5 hours, and 3 hours in he caved and turned to Gir for help. A mistake he was finally acknowledging now.

“No! No more turning Dib into food ideas!” He groaned, pushing his palms into his head to contain his growing headache.

“D’awwwww.” Gir frowned before gasping suddenly. “It’s time for my show!” He screamed running off to the living room, leaving Zim sitting at the dining table alone.

He worried his lip again, lightly tugging on his lowered antennae as he racked his brain and Pak for any inkling of an idea. He scowled as nothing of worth came to his mind. Who else could he turn to? Oh! Gaz! Maybe Gaz can help him! She was already helping Dib- presumably.

He searched for his phone as excitement bubbled within him, he almost dropped the phone as he hurriedly scrolled to Gaz’s contact. Hours of worrying is finally over!

“ _Zim? Did you tell Dib? Is he on his way-?”_

“Dib-sister! I request your help in my finding of Dib’s gift! I understand you are already assisting Dib so You can also help-“

“ _Let me stop you there._ **_No_ ** _. Dib already dragged me into this-_ **_unwillingly-_ ** _and I’m only helping because he’s my brother. I don’t want to be more involved in your disgustingly lovey-dovey relationship any more than I have to.”_

“But-“ Zim stopped as the familiar tone of the call ending rang. Well, now what?

Who could he turn to? Who could help him think of an amazing idea? One that would surely blow Dib away! If only there were more people who could match his superior intellect. Then this wouldn’t be so hard- wait. Of course! He could ask _himself!_ Or _himselves._ The Zimvoid!

Of course, he’d have to leave now, and he’d have to somehow release another distress signal once inside the portal- and have a means of escape afterward. Oh, whatever! He was Zim! He could figure out all of that later! All that matters is that he has others- those of smarter minds- those who other versions of _himself_ \- to console!

He hurried out of the dining room and to the building’s elevator. Earlier on, he had made the base bigger to accommodate the few major adjustments made since Dib moved in; all to fit the humans weird needs and preferences. 

“Computer!” 

**“What?”**

Zim huffed at the tone; it was always much nicer to Dib. “Tell Gir that you and him are to protect the base while I’m gone! I might take a few hours! Oh! And tell Dib he had left his er- cellular devi-“

**“You mean a Phone?”**

Zim paused to glare up at the ceiling. “Just tell him he left his _cellular device_ at Gaz’s home!” Zim waved off, tapping his foot impatiently as the elevator climbed to the second floor.

**“What do I tell him if he asks where you are?”**

Zim flinched, Dib would definitely catch on to his plans if he said anything, even if it were a hint. Sometimes he hated how perceptive his mate was, no matter how attractive the trait was. “Do not tell him where I am going! I know you plan to because you like him more! Isn’t that right? Well, your wrong computer! Because Dib only says ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ because his stupid human ‘manners’ force him to!” Zim screeched, stomping out once the doors opened. “I will shut you down before you have the chance to spill the corn!”

**“...but you haven’t even told me yet, and its ‘spill the beans’ not corn”**

“Oh, well…. Shut up! You don't need to know.” Zim sputtered, making his way to his cruiser and climbing inside. “Just protect the base until my return!”

**“Fine.”**

Zim nodded at the confirmation, clicking the button to close the windshield as he typed in the estimated coordinates. It took him a while- as he doesn’t have the memory file of the old distress signal- but when he finally thought he had the correct numbers after a few minutes.

Satisfied he started his ship and opened up the roof for take off. He was going to create the _best_ plan, maybe even the greatest yet!  
  


~  
  


“Why did she even suggest that? I mean- getting Zim _lingerie?_ As an anniversary present? _I mean it would be more of a gift to myself than him-_ Shit! I mean- No! I'm not getting him lingerie as an anniversary present- But he _would_ look- No! Dammit!” Dib groaned, face flushed as he harshly clicked his turn signal to merge into his street, knuckles white from his tight hold on the wheel.

The 23-year-old was on his way back home after a long day of work, investigating another lead on bigfoot’s whereabouts, and after assembling all of the supplies for him and Zim’s 4th anniversary... He needed to go all out this time, _all out._ Zim basically made him his own spaceship car for crying out loud! His gift had to be just as grand for the little irken, to show Zim how much love he had for him!

Though, thinking of a gift was always difficult. Zim already had super-advanced technology, so that crossed out a wide choice of presents. Though he realized that mistake too late on their first anniversary. Making him his own VR headset and game? What was he thinking? Zim had a hologram room! _A hologram room_! He didn’t need a VR headset!

Then on their second anniversary, he tried to make Zim dinner; as the small alien had been getting quite homesick- or er- space sick? Whatever it was Zim was missing his old lifestyle around that time, so Dib took it upon himself to attempt to bring his lifestyle back to him. It hurt to see those precious raspberry eyes so lifeless after all. But Zim’s present for him? Zim got him a portable holographic laptop! It was the coolest, possibly even the greatest gift he ever received! And he was fairly certain he was the only human who had one!

On their third anniversary, Zim decked out his car; and when he said decked out- he meant _decked_ out. It could _fly_ now, even in space! It was- or could be if the speeding laws were different- _way_ faster than before. Plus he could radio in on channels from space! How cool was that? And what did Dib get his boyfriend? A stupid trip to an amusement park and a promise ring.

Though… Dib smiled as he pulled into his parking lot. Zim had looked _so_ happy that day. In fact, Dib closed his eyes as he remembered how every anniversary Zim seemed to be moved to tears. He was always so happy, and so grateful; no matter how menial his gifts were in comparison. Which is why Dib needed to get Zim the _best_ gift this time. He wanted to show Zim what a _good_ present was, he wanted to _spoil_ his alien.

Speaking of his alien.. Dib grinned as he scrambled out of his new and improved car. He can’t wait to get in the house as cuddle his boyfriend, he much needed the recharge of Zim’s heat and the feel of his smooth green skin… Dib rushed to the front door, fumbling with his keys as he felt excitement rush through him. Now that he thought about it, _he and Zim didn’t get to finish their morning escapades._

Earlier that day he had woken up to find that his hand had somehow found its way between Zim’s thighs sometime during the night, and Zim was _grinding_ down on it in his sleep with the cutest quiet moans. It had chalked up to be an amazing morning, to say the least. After realizing what was happening he was fully awake and eager. He started rubbing his fingers up against Zim’s wet and exposed clit, all the more thankful that the small alien only wore his old shirts for nightwear. 

Then Zim woke up, holding onto his arm so desperately, whining so _needly._ They shared a searing kiss, and Dib was about to insert a finger into those seductive velvety folds when they were rudely interrupted.

Gir had come barging into their room, whining about not having anything to eat. Zim, who was already embarrassed about Gir almost seeing them, immediately scooted away and off the bed. So Dib’s great morning became not so great as Zim had left him to placate the childish robot. 

He had to take a cold shower and refrain himself from strangling the unit. It was fine though, he needed to work on perfecting his net gun out of the old ray gun Zim gave him. Plus, he needed to get to work on the gift so it was fine.

It all worked out! If they had gone further than it would have thrown off his schedule, so in a way, it was good that Gir interrupted them as he had....... or that’s what Dib was telling himself as he roughly pulled the door open. He didn’t want to disassemble the sir unit! No! That was preposterous! Zim loved the deranged little menace, so he would miss him too much if Gir went missing.

**“Welcome home master Dib.”**

“Hey Computer,” Dib called out as he took off his boots, he paused for a moment to hear the expected yell of a welcome back from Zim only to hear nothing. “Hey uh, Where’s Zim?”

 **“Master Zim had left not too long ago, but he wanted me to tell you that you left your ‘** **_cellular device_ ** **’ at your sister’s home.”**

“Zim left? Where did he- Oh _shit_! I did leave my phone!” Dib cursed as he patted his pockets. “Do you know where he went?” He asked as he debated to leave his phone at Gaz’s or go pick it up.

 **“Master told me specifically not to tell you,”** there was a pause. **“...** **_and_ ** **he didn’t tell me where he was going.”**

“Of course he didn’t.” Dib sighed, pulling his boots back on.

He figured to go get his phone now than to leave it with Gaz, or she’d begin downloading hundreds of games on it to level up her _own_ games if he left it for the night, and he didn’t want that to happen again. How could ten measly phone apps add up to over 100 dollars?? Granted she probably bought things _on_ the games as well, but _come on!_

“Did he take the cruiser?” He strained, hurriedly pulling back on his boots.

**“Yes”**

“Okay! Track it for me! I’ll be back in a few, watch Gir and minimoose while I’m gone! Thanks, Computer!” Dib yelled, racing out the front door again, Zim was a big boy. He could take care of himself for now.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Its a little short but i wanted to get it out lol!

It's been a few hours since Zim had left Earth, and he was following coordinates that he wasn’t even properly sure of. Which is why, the further he went the more anxious he got. 

He passed another cluster of stars he wasn’t familiar with and felt his spooch twist into nervous knots. Surely he just didn’t notice that cluster being there?? It was fine, all was fine. He used to be the best invader after all, his memory couldn’t be flawed!

He slouched back onto his chair as he ran a hand down his face. It would take a while to reach the coordinates, and Dib was most likely home by now if he went off of his internal clock. Should he have left Dib a message? Maybe a warning? 

Shrugging Zim took out his phone scrolling to Dibs contact before he paused. He knows he should, that Dib would be  _ more _ angry if he contacted him later on. But - but he didn’t want to deal with the disappointed Dib  _ now.  _

He took in a deep breath and clicked the dial.

_ “Zim I swear to you if this is about Dibs anniversary present-“ _

Zim jolted. “Gaz? Why do you have Dibs phone? Where is Dib?”

He felt his eye twitch when he heard her long exaggerated sigh.  _ “Dib left his phone, remember?”  _ She spoke slowly and emphatically, making Zim flush in embarrassment.

“Right! Of course! I didn’t forget! I had just calculated with my superior intellect that Dib would have dropped by already to retrieve his phone!” Zim huffed, eyes drifting to the control panel as he lied, adjusting his hold on the phone when he noticed a weird signal.

_ “Right well-“  _ Gaz stopped and shuffling was heard over the phone; Zim only waited a second before Gaz began talking again.  _ “Damn, I’ll give you that one. Dib actually just arrived-“  _

Gaz was cut off again as Dibs voice came through the phone.  _ “Zim! What the hell?? Where did you go? Without telling me??” _

Zim swallowed, about to answer when his ship was abruptly pulled into something. All of a sudden a bright light engulfed him and he held his breath. He didn’t even notice he made it to the portal.

Once out he saw a blue planet, but before he could question it something hit his ship. Alarms began whirring and Zim dropped his phone in a panic. He flung himself onto the panel in a frenzy, clicking furiously as he tried to find out what hit him.

***Warning- left engine and wing has been damaged- Guns have been damaged- initiating self repair- starting backup power***

Zim cursed when the computer of the ship turned off with a hum, the ship whirring to a stop as the power switched to the backup source.

“What hit us?” He growled to himself, yelping as he was shoved to the side of his ship again as another blow was directed to the side of his ship.

_ “Initiate shield!”  _ He screeched, scrambling to sit properly again.

***Not enough power for shields***

“What do you  _ mean  _ not enough power for shield-”

* **incoming call- caEll- cAalLzl -zrrrrrrrrrrrr-** **_SHUTTING DOWN*_ **

Zim blanched as all the lights in the ship shut off, leaving him in complete darkness as he was hitting desperately on the control panel.

He felt his chest tighten painfully as fear began to consume him whole, his voot cruiser wasn’t acting as it normally should. The only explanation for its poor behavior and inevitable shut down had to be because something hacked into his system after the first hit. 

He gritted his teeth as he prepared himself, his pak releasing his space suit for him to quickly pull on. Once he was properly suited up he got his pak legs at the ready, leaning forward to look out his windshield.

His eyes widened, was the planet getting closer or was that just him?

He bit his bottom lip, hands gripping the chair desperately as he pushed back against the harsh cushion, He was breaking into the atmosphere, without shields,  _ in a dead ship _ .

Shit.

  
  


~

  
  


“Zim? Zim! What the fuck just happened? Zim!” Dib yelled, feeling all the air leave his lungs the second he heard the small chitter of fear that left Zim’s mouth; the harsh shuffling that followed only made him panic more. “Zim answer damnit!” 

He felt his heart sink when the call ended in a tone. “Shit!”

“So, are you gonna go get him? If you are… can I come with? I wanna try flying your car.” Gaz spoke after a pause, the clicking of her game slave being turned off the only sound in the room.

“Fuck! Why did he go into  _ space?  _ Without me?” Dib growled to himself repeatedly clicking the dial button and cursing when it went to voicemail.

“... Im not hearing a no...” 

“If he could have just  _ waited  _ I could’ve went with him! He better be okay, I fucking swear he better be okay. Ill punish him again if he got himself fucking hurt.” Dib continued getting more and more unhinged.

“ _ Okay _ ...I’m just going to get the keys.” Gaz monotoned, turning and walking towards the car, grabbing the keys on her way out. “I’ll wait for you outside.” 

“I can't believe him! Can you believe him Gaz?” Dib scoffed, following her blindly out the door and into the driveway, auburn eyes glued to the Zim’s contact. 

“Uh huh.” Gaz nodded, walking to the passenger side and opening the door for Dib to climb in before going back to the drivers door, getting into the drivers seat with a grin. 

“Out in space! On his own! What if he got hurt?” Dib continued, a hand gripping his hair.

“Yep.” Gaz agreed, staring at the handle with a gleam in her eyes. “So how do I switch this baby into ship mode or whatever?”

“That switch right there- but Zim has been doing so good lately! Why does he never  _ listen- _ Wait hold on.” Dib stopped, looking up and around in confusion. “Wait what are we doing? Why are you in the driver's seat.”

“Not important Dib. Zim needs help, no wasting time. Ill fly you to your house—.” Gaz explained, flicking the switch and initiating the cars flight mode; an excited grin stretching her mouth as the steering wheel shifted into something more convenient. 

“ _ Fly- _ wait **fly?”**

“—And then you’ll find out his latest coordinates, get whatever stupid shit you need, and we’re off.” Gaz ended, foot slamming on the gas pedal forcing them to take off down the driveway.

Dib screamed as Gaz took a sharp turn onto the street. He gripped the handle just above the door as they slowly lifted from the ground. “Do you even know how to fly this?” He yelled, deeply relieved that her street was empty under his panic.

“That's a stupid question dib.” Gaz clicked her tongue, “I drove Tak’s ship perfectly fine before.”

“Yeah, but Tak’s ship didn’t have a steering wheel!” Dib cringed as his ears popped as they shot up into the sky. “And why do we need to  _ fly? _ ”

“Because fuck traffic thats why.” Gaz rolled her eyes. “Come  _ on _ Dib, you’d think with a head that big you’d be smarter.”

“What- Hey- Gaz! My head is  _ not  _ big!” Dib squawked. “Its  _ normal!” _

“As is that voice crack. Anyways we have  _ another  _ stupid idiot to save.” 

Dib huffed, turning his gaze back to his phone with a frown. “Well you’re right about Zim bring an idiot.”

“Of course I am.”

The drive there was relatively quick, but to Dib it felt like Time was at a crawl. He could hear his heartbeat drum in his ears and his fingers were starting to feel numb from how hard he was gripping his phone. 

He knew Zim could take car of himself, heck the little alien was a power house when he wanted to be, but he couldn’t help the anxiety that was crawling up his back.

His lungs felt constricted as he imagined Zim finding trouble for goodness knows what he went into space. Could he have been kidnapped by space pirates? Maybe the Tallest’s broke their promise and decided to kidnap Zim for their own?

Not knowing where his boyfriend was was eating at him quickly, and it seemed it was very obvious as Gaz gave him a worried glance.

“Hey Dib calm down, take deep breaths. Zim is probably fine. He has laser guns in his weird back pack-“

“Pak.” Dib cut in as he tried to regulate his breathing.

“Whatever. All im saying is he is packing. So he can defend himself okay? Chill out, we’ll get him back.”

“Yeah… yeah. He’s fine.” Dib nodded breathless.

“Yeah, remember how he attacked that weird creature that attacked you when we went camping?” Gaz offered, keeping her eyes in front of her.

“Yeah, a little bit.” Dib nodded slowly, breath hitching again.

“He shot out his stupid pak legs and shot the thing near to death. Hell, even some of those giant trees around us fell down in the fight.” Suddenly her grip on the wheel tightened and a scowl overtook her features. “Ill never forgive him for getting us banned from there.” She growled.

“Oh yeah, the park ranger was  _ so  _ angry with us! And Zim was only making it worse by patronizing him!” Dib started with a laugh. “Calling him a incompetent tree watcher drone.”

“And comparing him to a ‘useless and cowardice smeet’ yep. What even is a smeet by the way?”

“Smeet in irken language is the equivalent of an earth baby.” Dib explained chuckling. 

“Huh,” Gaz hummed. “So when he told me ‘dont worry smeet’ He was comparing me to a baby?”

“He called you a smeet?” Dib laughed.

“Do you want to meet your maker too Dib?” She snipped, huffing when he went silent. “Thought so.” She growled, landing the car into the drive way.

Dib wasted no time in pushing his door open and racing to the front door.

“Computer! Did you track down Zim’s ship?” Dib yelled, tripping into his house while attempting to kick off his boots. 

**“Yes, He’s-”**

“Transfer the coordinates to my car!” Dib rushed out as he skidded into the living room. “Gir! Minimoose! I’ll be gone for a while, until I get back Computer is in charge-“

“Hi Mary!”

Dib stopped, controlling his erratic breathing with a heavy sigh. “Yes Hi Gir— now Computer is in charge so listen to—“

“Nyah.”

“Hi minimoose, now- now just  _ listen _ ,” Dib stressed waving his hands emphatically. “Ill be gone and Computer is in  _ charge-“ _

**“Actually,”**

“What  _ now?”  _ Dib groaned.

**_“_ ** **I’m not sure leaving me in charge right now is a smart decision. I‘ll be preoccupied with not caring. I had to watch the house before you got home, I don't want to anymore.”**

Dib stood stuck in a stupor, not believe his ears. He had places to be, a boyfriend to save! Why did these guys have to make something that should be so  _ simple  _ so  _ difficult? _

**“In all, I‘m not gonna.”**

“Fine! Fine. Minimoose is in charge then-“

“Nyah.”

“Oh  _ come on!”  _ Dib exclaimed throwing his head back to groan up at the ceiling. 

“I’ll be in charge!” Gir grinned, jumping to stand excitedly on the couch.

“No!” Dib shook his head. “No, definitely not.” 

“Why??” Gir frowned scrambling off the couch to grab onto Dibs pants dramatically. “I’ll do the best to lead them! Take me off the bench coach!” He whined dramatically. “I swear I still got fight left in me! Put me in!”

“Nyah.”

“What? No! Gir will blow the house up Minimoose. I’m  _ not  _ leaving him in charge!” Dib exasperated. 

**“Well, Gir has done a relatively good job protecting the base before you and the master started living together. I dont see why he cant now.”**

“Well that was  _ before,  _ I dont know if I can just leave him in charge in good conscious-“

He was interrupted by the booming sound of a car honking.

“Dib! Get your ass back out here! This tracker thing is saying Zim’s ship shut down!” Gaz’s yelled, voice carrying through the opened door. 

“What do you mean its shut down?” Dib parroted, anxiety climbing back up to its spilling point. 

“Just get out here!”

“Okay-okay- um! Gir you're in charge- I’ll be back with Zim soon!” Dib struggled out, yanking Gir off his legs and running out the door. “Don’t break anything!”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you all enjoyed! More to come soon! Trying to get better at updating- but no promises TTvTT


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